Scientists Discover Woman Who Hates Traveling

girl-shrugging-shoulders-confusedScientists have discovered a single woman, who wishes to remain anonymous, that has no desire whatsoever to travel. While many men are skeptical of such a woman, the research and data on the female individual speaks for itself.

“We’ve checked into her facebook profile, online dating profiles, and went through several rounds of lie detector tests,” said Cambridge Research Chief, Al Speers. “While we cannot be 100% accurate with tests like these, we can say we are about 99.98% sure she isn’t lying.” It should be noted that the percentage of accuracy would hold up in a court of law. The profiles indicate the woman’s content for her current location in New York City, which is considered by many to be one of the best cities in the world. Her job as a copywriter for a known ad agency enables both a creative outlet and enough money to enjoy some of the more popular restaurants, bars, and events in the metropolitan area. Plus, she is only a half hour train ride away from her family and childhood friends.

“I just don’t see a need to travel,” says the anonymous woman. “There’s never a shortage of activities in the city, and I love coming home to my own bed – not having to worry about what went on in some dirty hotel bed.”

This breakthrough in mankind comes at a time where most thought this type of behavior was extinct. Eligible bachelors have already began searching for the woman, some spending thousands of dollars just to locate the one-of-a-kind woman and “lock her down.”

“Dude, are you shitting me?” said 26 year old Financial Analyst, Mike Stucco. “Are you telling me I could just stay in the city and not have to drop like 5 G’s to go to some stupid country like France or Spain, just to hold down a girlfriend? Can you give me her last name, please?”

As of now, she is considered the most sought after girl in the entire country. Due to the high volume of messages and stalkers, the single woman has recently removed all of her online profiles. It’s even been reported that men have gone as far as traveling great distances just to see if they too could discover her.


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